There are some music milestones that shake a generation of
music fans, sometimes good and sometimes bad. April 8th 1994 is a
date that will stick in rock fans’ minds and their worlds would stop for a
moment as they heard the news that Nirvana singer Kurt Cobain’s body had been
found following his suicide three days earlier.
That fateful day is one that I missed as I wouldn't be born
for almost another two years after, but growing up listening to rock, grunge
and punk music meant Kurt Cobain was definitely an idol of mine. From first
listening to ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ to learning how to play ‘Come As You Are’
on drums, Nirvana has always been one of my favourite bands. Kurt’s influence
continues to be heavy for many music fans, encouraging them to start bands,
start writing, or just become and embrace the person they want to be.
But fame wasn't what Cobain wanted at all. Battling his
personal demons constantly and maybe being too fragile to cope with the
pressure of stardom, facing screaming fans and devoted audiences was
potentially a ticking time bomb for him. Perhaps he was too far in it all to
realise just how much of an impact his music was and would always have on the
world and how he would have a much larger influence than many of his own
heroes.
With all that in mind, and although it was shocking, Cobain’s
death also seems sadly inevitable. Watching Nirvana’s MTV “Unplugged” has made me
realise that nobody, no matter how incredible they are, can burn a fire of
passion that strong and keep it going for very long. For someone dealing with
unimaginable mental and physical troubles, keeping hold of that flame without
cracking and without even wanting to be as famous as he was, is was only a
matter of time before it all got too much for him.
To many fans, Cobain seemed like an ordinary guy who had
unintentionally stumbled into rock stardom and then recoiled from his fame
after he reached the heights that some people spend their lives striving for.
But his death also preserved him as the perfect artist who hadn't had the
chance to suffer a decline.
With his death being so abrupt and shocking at the prime of
his career, who knows what he could have gone on to achieve? He might have thrown
it all away to be left alone- something he seemed to want most of all. Gone on
to focus on being the best dad and continued to lead a ‘normal’ life even.
Nirvana drummer Dave Grohl progressed to being the leader of Foo Fighters, and
bassist Krist Novoselic now focuses on his personal life. Kurt Cobain could
have gone on to do absolutely anything.
It’s been written many times that the voice of a generation
was lost when Cobain pulled the trigger and left behind the suicide note
quoting Neil Young lyrics about how it’s better to “burn out than to fade away”.
Many fans are still selfishly mad about only having three albums and some
outtakes scattered on YouTube. True, it will never be enough of the man that
held so much passion and talent and who’s life tragically ended too early. But
while fans lost their rock star, others lost even more. His bandmates lost
their creative brother and dear friend. His wife Courtney Love lost her
husband, and their daughter Frances Bean lost the father she sadly hardly knew.
Kurt Cobain’s suicide left a huge hole in every life that
was touched by him. But his legacy will live on for decades. Even if you’re
only just starting to listen to Nirvana or were holding up a candle in respect
21 years ago, every second of the great man’s work will move you in the moment
you listen to it. That’s something only truly great artists can achieve.
